Sunday, November 25, 2012

inadequate

inadequate (adj)
not adequate; lacking the quality or quantity required; insufficient for a purpose 
[synonyms: inapt, incompetent, defective, imperfect, incomplete]

I've been feeling like this for the past month and a half. I'm only 24 years old, and I've been given the biggest responsibility: a Managing Editor for three magazine titles. When I was given the position, I was TERRIFIED. Me? Editor? No way....what? I had to learn things along the way, how the process went. For two weeks straight, I worked non-stop just trying to catch up and learning the ins and outs. Instead of celebrating this promotion, I was stressed, stressed, stressed. I wanted everything to be perfect; but instead, there was always something wrong or something that needed to be fixed.

I kept reminding myself of the story of Gideon, how God used an unlikely person to further His Kingdom. In the case of Gideon, he was just a farmer who had no intentions to do more than he was comfortable doing. But then one day, God called him to defeat the Midianites. Gideon was straight up scared and unprepared for the task that was given to him. Without any experience in an army, how was a small, young farmer going to defeat this group of people? God was with him along the way. Even when Gideon was left to lead an army of 300 people, his faith didn't shatter. He followed everything that God told him to do, and in the end God's army won.

God uses our weaknesses to show how great and powerful He is. Our faiths are tested when we solely rely on His strength. And when we allow him to use us, we are forever transformed. Gideon is one of many amazing stories where God uses ordinary people for extraordinary things.

As I noted in my "Letter from the Editor," we just need a little faith and dive right in. I think about all the things God has thrown into my life where I thought, "Why me?" When I was given this promotion, the same question ran through my head. Why me? Why give this role to someone who graduated from a small university? Why now?

Because it's part of God's story. This is part of my journey. Just need a little faith.